Baseball Analogies

I must have wasted a good fifteen minutes during lunch today trying to fully understand the game of baseball, an American classic. Everyone knows first base, second base, third base, and home plate, so I'll skip those.

Infield Fly - When you try to ask a girl out by stalking her and sending her an e-mail

RBI - Being a good wingman

Double Play - Being a bad wingman

Triple Play - Probably going to get your ass kicked

The Minor Leagues - Alcohol

Little League - GHB

Randy Johnson - Adriana Lima

Tim Wakefield - A lesbian

Sacrifice Bunt - Bunts are kind of quick and sneaky, but rarely result in getting to first base yourself. A sac bunt is when your buddy is talking to a girl, you walk up and grab her ass, then he punches you in the face.

Sacrifice Fly - Less sneaky than a bunt. Your friend is talking to girl. You walk up to her friend and ask if she wants to have sex. If she says "Ewww, no," then he punches you in the face. If she says yes... well sometimes those fly balls go over the fence.

Grand Slam - Gangbang, definitely gangbang